today's goals are:

4 mar 4
today's goals were:
1. tasty


2. punished


3. convenience


5 mar 4
today's goals were:
1. "what is that?"


2. "I'd like to thank my parents"


3. "don't I know you?"


6 mar 4
today's goals were:
1. sense


2. staple


3. rewind

this is directed towards you

I wish I was one of your close friends.
one of the ones you keep in your breast pocket
one of the ones you find in the ass of your jeans
just before you do a load of laundry
like a tissue set aside for safe keeping
you know "just in case"
cause just in case the ground falls from beneath your feet
just in case your knees give under the pressure of the world
resting heavily upon your shoulders
there I am to catch you, hold you, care for you
there I am to remind you you're strong
there I am to remind you I've always been here
standing on the sidelines watching you drag yourself around
drag yourself down
down to their level, the one you left me on
standing by the guidelines
every one you've read and not followed
but there you are drowning yourself in a cocktail of sorrows and spirits
we all know this isn't something you can fix with a kiss
but someone has to wake you from this nightmare you're slumbering in
so give me your lips and let me whisper these reassurances against your breath
maybe a touch can lead you back to here and now
where I'll always be waiting for you.

it was a black and white day

tell me what to see.

I think she's my favorite


this is a work in progress

emotions. in variety.

you know you want some

anyone for some ice cream?










man that was some good ice cream



I hope no one saw me eating my ice cream like that
they might think the wrong thing!


aaw geez but it was god damn good.

remembering you, how you used to be...

I saw you walking down the street lost in the background noise found in the voices in your head telling you the obvious so you can state it for the rest of us, that which we can't see for ourselves. there was a look on your face I couldn't see, your eyes downcast, looking through the ground no longer beneath your feet. because you remembered a memory that was pieced together in a dream last night you didn't remember upon waking that had you searching in vain for baby photos to smile at and imagine someone had once cooed at you. there was something in your gait I noticed in the side view mirror as we flew past you. not quite the world weighting your back into mother earth but your mind weighting you down. heavy in your skull dragging you to the ground. the moon and stars blacked out by the lights just above eye level washing away any semblance of nature. holding your hand as you blindly wander down these paths in life. you can't see where you're going until you look but fear makes you blink so fast you miss the opportunity that was "it". whatever it may be. it. not like the movie.
I'm not afraid of you.
but maybe I am.
afraid.
of myself.

back ground noises

please note: the mae_ak are the new mae photos

don't tell me this now please.

I am so in love right now

1. "yeah. I remember highschool."


2. "boy oh boy"


3. hair

please sir, can I have some more?

most of us are



in a society we have an amazing love/hate relationship with

only capable of moving forward
but what is forward we ask?


our fight against "the man"
remain small and hidden


day by day


wondering what art will be tomorrow


we all put on


and masks in the hopes that it will fake our fellows
citizens in a dying culture


soon it won't just be our meager lives

before our blind eyes

we're told by (our) big brother

now is not the time.
(when is the time then, brother?)

all we can do is bide our time
always waiting



distrorted visions haunt us in our waking
sleep a restort where we hide in dreams

a safe haven where we can hide from this

reality

convenience and technology devour what it is to be human
our voices lost in numbers and man made noises


artificialism and consumerism light up our nights

poisoning our children's dreams

all they'll have left is our mess we've left behind

as a remind of our existence
"I was here."

that's how it always is

feb 27 04
1. bundled


2. impatient


3. forgiving


feb 28 04
1. gross


2. fast


3. poohead


feb 29 04
1. flight


2. trying


3. hunger


on a more obvious note...




mar 1 04
1. smile


2. thought


3. "call me"


today
1. style


this is the photo (and kind person) who inspired my "style" goal


2. confuse(d)


3. myself


another game of catch up. oh days, you run away from me.