you feel just like me? that's unlikely.
hope there's more?
Thursday, April 29, 2004
Tuesday, April 27, 2004
Monday, April 26, 2004
now that I knew that I didn't know
I can't believe I was standing in the cereal aisle debating what kind of fucking cereal to get [yes. fucking is necessary in this context]. there are way too many "sugar bombs" and marshmellows on the markets to rot out children's teeth to cavities and dentures. I feel I'm a bit more "grown up" as I can't really stand eating cereal that's made to be consumed by kids who want to be hopped up on sugar. oooh the days of sugar highs. I got honey nut cheerios. the big box. yes cheer E ohs. they were the cheapest cereal that looked marginally tasty and edible.
although I remember that day two years ago I was craving some cheerios. I went down to the basement to get a box from the store [we have a bomb shelter in our basement, or as jason so loveingly called it "fucking sams club"]. the box wasn't opened and I couldn't remember how long they'd been there but there was stuff there that was far older and we still ate it. so I'm upstairs, bowl glistening infront of me, yearning, begging me to pour some cereal and then smother it in some silky cool milk. pookie is waiting just as impatiently so finally I tear at the box and pour. pouring goes well until I notice a few moths tumble out of the box and lay lifeless in my bowl of cheerios.
well. there goes that craving.
it gets better though. months later I have a craving for honey nut cheerios. I found a bag in a tupper ware container in the pantry upstairs. I pour the cereal into the bowl hesitantly, seeing no moths I pour the milk and dive in.
man does it taste good. I'd forgotten how good honey nut cheerios were. the slight taste of honey wasn't too overwhelming, it was enough to make the cereal more than enjoyable.
until I find a moth swimming in the spoonfull of milk and honey nut cheerios destined for my mouth.
MOTHER FUCKER. I JUST CAN'T WIN.
if the box I just bought has any moths in it I will fucking lose it.
the end.
although I remember that day two years ago I was craving some cheerios. I went down to the basement to get a box from the store [we have a bomb shelter in our basement, or as jason so loveingly called it "fucking sams club"]. the box wasn't opened and I couldn't remember how long they'd been there but there was stuff there that was far older and we still ate it. so I'm upstairs, bowl glistening infront of me, yearning, begging me to pour some cereal and then smother it in some silky cool milk. pookie is waiting just as impatiently so finally I tear at the box and pour. pouring goes well until I notice a few moths tumble out of the box and lay lifeless in my bowl of cheerios.
well. there goes that craving.
it gets better though. months later I have a craving for honey nut cheerios. I found a bag in a tupper ware container in the pantry upstairs. I pour the cereal into the bowl hesitantly, seeing no moths I pour the milk and dive in.
man does it taste good. I'd forgotten how good honey nut cheerios were. the slight taste of honey wasn't too overwhelming, it was enough to make the cereal more than enjoyable.
until I find a moth swimming in the spoonfull of milk and honey nut cheerios destined for my mouth.
MOTHER FUCKER. I JUST CAN'T WIN.
if the box I just bought has any moths in it I will fucking lose it.
the end.
hope there's more?
la la la la laHOLY FUCKING HELL!
I had my wound dressed.
the ladies were all surprised
they were all "OH YOU POOR DEAR. DOES IT HURT?"
uh. no. not really.
"ARE YOU KIDDING? THAT LOOKS SO PAINFUL."
no really. it doesn't hurt. could you stop coping a feel of my wound?
for serious, one of the nurses was like fucking stroking my leg.
damn it I wasn't even riding it. I don't have any cool story to tell.
I was. um. standing too close to the moped. no I didn't do any triple back hand spring flips with a scissor kick splits combo to get off and accidently slip and burn myself. no. I was just standing near it. yeah. I suck. I'm lame and dumb. no more affairs with mopeds.
someone said [nathaniel being that someone] "he wanted to burn you before you could burn him"
true that though. hah. so true. although. no. that can't be true. cause. no. not true.
I'm excited. oh the weekend. hurry home.
the ladies were all surprised
they were all "OH YOU POOR DEAR. DOES IT HURT?"
uh. no. not really.
"ARE YOU KIDDING? THAT LOOKS SO PAINFUL."
no really. it doesn't hurt. could you stop coping a feel of my wound?
for serious, one of the nurses was like fucking stroking my leg.
damn it I wasn't even riding it. I don't have any cool story to tell.
I was. um. standing too close to the moped. no I didn't do any triple back hand spring flips with a scissor kick splits combo to get off and accidently slip and burn myself. no. I was just standing near it. yeah. I suck. I'm lame and dumb. no more affairs with mopeds.
someone said [nathaniel being that someone] "he wanted to burn you before you could burn him"
true that though. hah. so true. although. no. that can't be true. cause. no. not true.
I'm excited. oh the weekend. hurry home.
hope there's more?
yoga in the shower
so I redressed my wound last night and was told not to let it get wet.
"you shower in the morning? well..... wrap it in celophane or something. do anything to keep it dry. we will redress it for you in the morning."
do anything you say? anything. the celophane idea just doesn't work in my mind. some how my dumbass would get water on, in, and under the bandage.
waking this morning I remember being half awake last night with both of my feet extended at the foot of my bed thinking, "hey, I can do releves. hooray! I can participate in ballet tomorrow!" however, coming to this morning, I can barely stretch my foot or point my toes. should I get a dr's note? meh. I'll just tell my teacher I'm sitting out. I'll read my little ballet book I got.
back to this shower. I thought I could just hide my right leg behind the shower curtain. I feel water running down my calf [not my baby cow fool] so I panic. I have a towel rod right next to the shower so I prop my foot up on that.
the whole shower.
talk about searing pain. I can't stretch like that.
but I had no choice. I need to shower.
I almost slipped and died at least 12893730423721980230900000 times.
I hate mopeds. HATE4MOPEDS
"you shower in the morning? well..... wrap it in celophane or something. do anything to keep it dry. we will redress it for you in the morning."
do anything you say? anything. the celophane idea just doesn't work in my mind. some how my dumbass would get water on, in, and under the bandage.
waking this morning I remember being half awake last night with both of my feet extended at the foot of my bed thinking, "hey, I can do releves. hooray! I can participate in ballet tomorrow!" however, coming to this morning, I can barely stretch my foot or point my toes. should I get a dr's note? meh. I'll just tell my teacher I'm sitting out. I'll read my little ballet book I got.
back to this shower. I thought I could just hide my right leg behind the shower curtain. I feel water running down my calf [not my baby cow fool] so I panic. I have a towel rod right next to the shower so I prop my foot up on that.
the whole shower.
talk about searing pain. I can't stretch like that.
but I had no choice. I need to shower.
I almost slipped and died at least 12893730423721980230900000 times.
I hate mopeds. HATE4MOPEDS
hope there's more?
Sunday, April 25, 2004
this is how the night should have ended
la la la
so I was leading the moped gang and then when my bike slipped out of my grasp I reached for the seat and fell burning myself like never before. photos later kids. I saw him. pouting lips hiding in a smile. his eyes gazing upon me like a lazy savannah afternoon, I thought a breeze was blowing across the room and only I felt it. and then just as quickly as I felt that breeze there he was no longer standing against the door post looking in my direction but gone.
"it was nice meeting you."
I've seen you around though. on campus. in the library. in my dreams I'll say this is different. and maybe it is this time. maybe it was last time. I never know. I never do until it's too late. and maybe it is.
but fuck does this hurt. a searing pain right above my right ankle. I should take photos now before it's enflamed and fucked looking. yes. someone fucked my ankle. a boy throwing a party who remembered what class we had together. his intentions and motives were purely hormone driven whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiich. is not my jam.
but I did have fun. love love love. I do. you. love.
oh and of course, my horoscope lied... although a boy tried to prove it wrong and all he got was me burning myself on his moped. *cries
so I was leading the moped gang and then when my bike slipped out of my grasp I reached for the seat and fell burning myself like never before. photos later kids. I saw him. pouting lips hiding in a smile. his eyes gazing upon me like a lazy savannah afternoon, I thought a breeze was blowing across the room and only I felt it. and then just as quickly as I felt that breeze there he was no longer standing against the door post looking in my direction but gone.
"it was nice meeting you."
I've seen you around though. on campus. in the library. in my dreams I'll say this is different. and maybe it is this time. maybe it was last time. I never know. I never do until it's too late. and maybe it is.
but fuck does this hurt. a searing pain right above my right ankle. I should take photos now before it's enflamed and fucked looking. yes. someone fucked my ankle. a boy throwing a party who remembered what class we had together. his intentions and motives were purely hormone driven whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiich. is not my jam.
but I did have fun. love love love. I do. you. love.
oh and of course, my horoscope lied... although a boy tried to prove it wrong and all he got was me burning myself on his moped. *cries
hope there's more?
Friday, April 23, 2004
Thursday, April 22, 2004
Sunday, April 18, 2004
Friday, April 16, 2004
Wednesday, April 14, 2004
oh but my heart does flutter so
she is the most beautiful
especially when she smiles
or laughs or speaks or breathes
especially when she smiles
or laughs or speaks or breathes
hope there's more?
Monday, April 12, 2004
I'm falling for another girl
discarded like a dirty pair of underwear
worn to skid marks and waste bands
yesterday's trash is tomorrow's invention
the latest in now's gadgetry
bought loved and forgotten in a moment
much like you in that instant[ance]
of a lustful gaze devoid of all else
conversations with necks lips ears
not a single voice spoke in between the gasps
moans in sleep wake mistaken loves
the sun drawing them out
silence leading them back home
to emptiness encompassing like a comforting blanket
wrapping hollow eyes in that familiar feeling
sight found in darkness within a cold place
hearts shattered against imaginary walls
with no where to climb or fall all that's left is to fly
icarus may have lent wings of wax and feathers
society dehumanizes and modernizes
worn to skid marks and waste bands
yesterday's trash is tomorrow's invention
the latest in now's gadgetry
bought loved and forgotten in a moment
much like you in that instant[ance]
of a lustful gaze devoid of all else
conversations with necks lips ears
not a single voice spoke in between the gasps
moans in sleep wake mistaken loves
the sun drawing them out
silence leading them back home
to emptiness encompassing like a comforting blanket
wrapping hollow eyes in that familiar feeling
sight found in darkness within a cold place
hearts shattered against imaginary walls
with no where to climb or fall all that's left is to fly
icarus may have lent wings of wax and feathers
society dehumanizes and modernizes
hope there's more?
