I felt for you and almost drowned

richmond was being washed away by tropical storm gaston yesterday and tried to take me with it

how can you love me?

teh emo


this goes out to vieve and one other someone *blush*


this is what the one other someone makes me do quite often

usually with very little to no effort at all

she told me to

yes, I'm back
and so is the brick wall
MOTHER FUCKERS!

I wish I was

I forgot to tell you about the bad trip. the acid induced one. the stairs up the falling case had a twist and turn that sent each of us spiraling. on the way back a little man stopped me for directions. hiding behind a mask I lead him to where I had just come from. I thought it would be fun if he went on a little vacation of his own. sadly he got lost and ended up in 91 when I first moved here.

I should've given you a reason

a stop off at the past on the trek home with a little swimming in the industry and I'm ready to rest. I met a stranger preaching of man eating bridges plaguing a dying city. I found my little brother a few days later. I took him somewhere new and he liked it so much he tried to drown himself in his hot cocoa. there were several good reasons to like the place. the side with the library in shop was nonsmoking and it came with a boy and his guitar. my mom had surgery a few weeks before she made her way to the midwest. she really likes the accessories she now comes with.my sister and I went to a tennis match butt naked to see if we could catch any tennis balls. we did not succeed. I was almost positive I would find a cadaver of my own in the alley. I had much better luck in the market. quite exciting. he's fun to poke. mom and dad tried to buy me something pocket sized but I used my mastery of throwning a temper tantrum and won the battle. suffice it to say they got lots of looks when we were driving back. but we drove through west virginia so it wasn't surprising in the least but then I saw a small dog and wished I had gotten that instead. it would've smelled a little less terrible. I found a note in my cadaver's pocket. it said "something, love guido." we all walked to church so we wouldn't have to go the next day. I broke my legs along the way and couldn't make it. I now have two lovely mahogany peg legs. if you ask nicely and pour whiskey on my head I will say "AAAAR." I was going to acquire myself a pirate ship but the sharks in the water scared me away. to get away from it all I built a raft out of my peg legs and floated down the ohio river hoping I could reenact mister finn's voyages. I was fished out of the river not too many days after I set sail and was shipped home in a box. I was left in the hall way for a few days which was a big mistake because the dogs will pee all over anything left in the hall. I didn't mind smelling like pee when I was finally taken out of the box and layed down to rest because a little love dog was next to me.

you're my past.

the house breathes in its sleep, I dream in its wake. strange dreams that only peek to the surface around this time of the month tease motions into the sheets and all I can do is go with it. late nights lead to late mornings and lack of showers due to bike rides in the early morrow to find the past. confusion but we weren't really sure anyways. the ice cream. ah. the ice cream. almost as good as the sushi. I think of home. sadly. happily. never really sure anymore. what if opportunities on the way side are more fruitful and long lasting than past ones which haven't been touched in years? time is playing the "hey. guess what? ...oh nevermind." game and all I want it to do is tell me the truth.

...where do we go from here?

I'm my me.

watch out
I'm over this
maybe it's just a fantasy
but it doesn't really matter
to me. to she. to you.
too late. goodbye truth.

I'm coming home.

I had one last chance to see.
I closed my eyes turning away.
sight nothing but sad memories.
I thought I'd never say this
but for all those years we didn't get along.
wishes of pride dissipating in the new tomorrow
and stubborn drowning to apologize
as he sings "and I just hope they know."
me repeating "I want the best for them."
he whispering "I'm hardly there."
and I let go.
not to hold on this time.
I thought I could fix parts of me
with everything out of my grasp though
and bits and pieces lost in you and he
I couldn't help but drive blind crashing
there's nothing left to say. do. make.
I can't save me from myself.
I'm to blame. my sick cry for help.